First of all, there is the argument that the church is either all true or not true. If it is all true, then there should be no argument about letting gays into the church. If it is not true, then why are you fighting to get in. (personally I think gay mormons want to stay in the church because it is easier, and also for the social aspect).
I love this church. I love what it does to people (generally), to families, individuals, communities. So how can I ask them to change what they believe to coincide with what I believe. If I truly love it, I shouldn't be trying to change it. Furthermore, if I really do expect the Church to change and accept my belief's (that being gay is okay)... then the Church should also be expected to accept other's beliefs. It is unrealistic, illogical and unfair to ask the church to change to fit you, but say "no, the church shouldn't change to fit another person's beliefs." And if the church is to change for me and for them, then what will it become?? just another church like any other church.
If you truly believe the church teachings, you should mold yourself to their ideals, not mold the church to yours. And if you don't believe what the church teaches, have some dignity and respect and leave the church to the members who do.